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Chris Cochrun 2022-01-03 12:41:35 -06:00
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<p>It shouldn&rsquo;t surprise me because it always happens this way, but somehow it <em>does</em>
surprise me, every time. I have recently finished a piece of work which had
consumed almost all of my time and focus at work for a number of weeks. There
was a fixed deadline and it was a substantial and complex piece of work. For
these reasons, it was also a bit stressful, but that&rsquo;s the way work is from time
to time. What surprised me (and shouldn&rsquo;t have done) is the way I felt after I
had finished it.</p>
<p>I was (of course) relieved and pleased to have completed it by the deadline.
It felt like a small but troublesome burden had been lifted from my shoulders.
After I had pressed the big &lsquo;Submit&rsquo; button, I went for a walk, and was
astounded that my mind was suddenly bubbling over with ideas, with links I
hadn&rsquo;t noticed before between this thing and those things, with interesting
phrases, metaphors and similies. I was <em>noticing</em> things in the world again,
asking questions and thinking about how to answer them. My mind felt playful and
light and expansive.</p>
<p>What I need to remember is that it is always like this. Deadlines are a fact of
life and I just have to deal with them when they come up, but the pressure they
impose is temporarily disastrous for my creativity. This means that I need to
have solved any problems relating to the task which require creative thought
long before the suffocating fog of the deadline descends. It&rsquo;s also why I
sometimes go quiet on this blog for weeks at a time. It&rsquo;s not that I don&rsquo;t have
time to write here, but more that I don&rsquo;t have the mental space to play around
with ideas. Everything feels suppressed and heavy. Once the deadline is over, I
feel as if a door or window has been thrown open and all the sights and sounds
and scents of the outdoors come flooding in again.</p>
<p>I&rsquo;m writing this as a reminder to future me that this is the way my brain works,
and I need to plan better for the pre-deadline and post-deadline effects.</p>